I always seem to have my most interesting conversations with God at the most random times. Rarely do I have heart changing experiences as I’m saying my prayers sleepily before bed. My best conversations usually happen with him when I’m running or out for a walk. Occasionally we get a good talk in while I’m driving or when he likes to be sneaky and wake me during the night. Probably due to the fact that I jammed my day too full to take time to visit with him. Today’s heart changing experience occurred while I was scrubbing my kitchen floors. I have a very large kitchen and three children who love to drag in dirt! So there was plenty of time to chat today!
I’ve been working on running a more organized household. Being a wife and mommy of three keeps me very busy! Plus I’m involved in ministry work and I also work part-time at a salon. So sometimes our poor home can look like a tornado blew right through it but I’m determined to change this! So I printed off a weekly cleaning schedule and today I got started.
As I was starting out hand washing my kitchen floor (it had to be done) I had thoughts running through my mind like “Is this really going to make a difference?” “I know the kids will just come clumping in with dirt on their boots.” “I’m sure my husband won’t remove his boots either.” ‘Just keeping up with my house and kids is a full-time job.” “Will I ever be able to have a career?’ “How do I think I can keep up with a job and this house?”
I can not tell you how quickly God got ahold of my negative mindset and started revealing to me the way my heart needed to change. For so many years I’ve had a very feminist mindset. I’m not saying that mindset is wrong but it’s not the mindset to have for my household. My husband and I were raised very differently. Both of our mothers were exceptional homemakers but my mom had me to help keep up with the house and although my father worked, I often remember him helping clean the house. In my husband’s household it was all boys and they all worked outside or in the shop with their father and their mother ran the household. She set very high standards in my husbands eyes as to what a wife and mother should look like.
So as God’s showing me this he starts revealing to me how I’ve been rebelling against my husband. Insistent on being a working woman instead of a woman who serves her family. Luckily God has changed my heart immensely over the past year and a half because I now desperately want to be a woman who serves her family but have had a hard time letting go of old ideals. God then started letting me see how I’ve thought of cleaning up after my family, being the cook, the teacher, the laundry folder etc as my job/chore instead of seeing that this is how I show my family i LOVE them! Epiphany!!! Acts of service is a Love Language and it just happens to be my husbands Love Language. Why It took me so long to realize this I don’t know but better late than never! Right?
By this time I’m pumped and really getting after this floor! I started realizing that it makes me happy to make my husband and children happy. I want them to know how much I love them. I want them to feel taken care of. I want to set high standards for my future daughter in-laws just like my mother in law has done for me.
So maybe we have old school roles in our home. I do the cleaning, cooking, and teach my daughter how to run a home. My husband works hard long hours. When he’s home he’s out in the shop working on vehicles or out in the yard with our boys and I am finally very ok with this!
I may not be a full-time salon owner like I always imagined but I do have a little booth in a beautiful salon in my hometown that is all mine when I have time for my “hobby” as my husband and even my salon owner like to jokingly call it and I do believe that as my home life becomes more organized God will keep giving me extra time for my “hobby” because he knows how much I love it and in the mean time I’m content. I’m content in the fact that my family knows they are loved.