One of the very first things that I started googling when I decided it was time to embark on this sober journey over two years ago was “how to feel more comfortable in social settings sober”. I googled every form of that phrase you could imagine. Would you like to know what I found? A lot of people wanting to know the answers to this question and not a whole lot of answers.
What are we suppose to drink now at outings or barbeques? Are we going to feel uncomfortable forever? I was looking to the more experienced recovery veterans for advice and the responses I was seeing went mostly like this “You drink water”. Not what I wanted to hear! Luckily soon after this I found my IG family and found so many people rockin this recovery life and I started learning from many of them and then other things have just come with time and experience.
I have even founded a recovery account on Instagram that I’m so proud of called Recovering Beauties and I’m inspired by these beautiful souls everyday! I feel motherly towards those new to recovery following my account and since Memorial weekend has now arrived I feel like this is the best time to share some advice! Lord knows we don’t have enough time to tell all of Drunk Misty’s Memorial Weekend Horror Stories (nor do I want too) so how about some positive Sober Misty advice!
So here are my top tips for Surviving The Holiday’s Sober:
1) I’m a Christian so before going into any situation that will be an “alcohol” environment I pray up. I’ve made the decision that I’m not going to hide in my house (which I did in the beginning). I’m going to live and whether I like it or not this world contains alcohol and I can’t avoid that. So I keep my spiritual life strong.
2) Dress confidently. I don’t care what the environment may be. If I’m going to be surrounded by my kryptonite than girl my hair and makeup is gonna look good! For example: My husband’s family races. These are not fancy events but they are loaded with alcohol. So I don’t care if I look out-of-place having my hair and makeup all done because that is what makes me feel confident and keeps my mind from going to negative places. So whatever makes you feel confident use it!
3) This is probably the tip that has helped me the most and took me time to figure out. If you are going to have to be in a social situation drink something special! Don’t drink water (I mean of course drink water everyone needs water ya know what I mean though haha) or pop. Something you can drink on the daily. Don’t even drink something the kids are drinking! In my opinion I’m an adult and I’m as girly as they come. I still want a pretty drink in a pretty cup! I don’t want someone to throw me a water bottle as they crack open their drinks so I’m made to feel like the word SOBER is written on my forehead! In actuality I don’t care who knows I’m sober but in the beginning of my journey it bothered me to feel different. So until you are comfortable you need to be in charge of making sure you have the drinks you want. I like to have sparkling water, or make a pretty, healthy, snazzy drink, or on fancy occasions I love sparkling juices. That stuff is amaze!
4)Always have someone you can call if you are not ok! This is a given or should be a given. Nobody but you can really determine when you are ready to be around alcohol. I feel like I should clarify that when I’m talking about being in an alcohol filled environment I’m not talking about choosing to socialize with people getting wasted. No one I socialize with anymore “parties”. They may be a responsible have a drink type (something I never understood). I’m talking about being at races, weddings, concerts, the lake, pool parties, barbeques, etc… even restaurants can have that bar feel to them and spark old unwanted feelings. I’m talking about being sober in this world!
5) Lastly this is advice that my husband has given me multiple times. Remember that YOU are still YOU! If your former self loved to dance well then friend I’m betting you still love to dance and you don’t need alcohol to do that. The first couple of times might make you a little uncomfortable but you’ve got to push past those fears and go shake your tail feather :)! If your former self loved cracking jokes and mingling with the crowd then you can still do that! Being more outgoing can be learned. Did you know that? You don’t need alcohols help. You can always step away from a situation nonchalantly for a few minutes if you ever feel overwhelmed, compose yourself, pray, and get back to enjoying life!
There is so much more I could say on this topic but I think I will keep it at 5 tips and not write a novel! You are strong, beautiful, brave, courageous, amazing, and you are going to make it! Keep fighting!
Side Note:These are the action steps that have worked for me and my recovery. You need to always take into account your own unique situation and do what is best for you and your recovery! Much love!
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